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Clown, Interrupted

bigxiiKeeping with yesterday’s idea, we decided to bring in outspoken Florida fan, clown, from majorleaguejerk.com to give us his thoughts on how excited he was to see his Gator team win. Actually, clown hates the Gators; he pledges allegiance to that team most sports fans refer to as “the other UT.” 

 I made several wagers on this year’s bowl season including this one, which I fortunately won.  Clown and I bet a post at each other’s respective blog-place of employment on the outcome of the BCS championship game: if the Big XII representative wins, I post at MLJ and if the SEC representative wins, he posts here.  As I’m sure you’re aware by now, the SEC representative blew up the Big XII representative.  Therefore, clown honors our bet below…I think. 

Congrats To Florida – You Did It!

On November 24th, 2008, I made the unfortunate mistake of wagering a post on the Big XII Champion beating the SEC Champion in this season’s BCS Championship. You see, there was a three way tie for 1st place in the Big XII South (the predestined Big XII Champion, and subsequently, one of the BCS Championship’s representatives) and the representative for the Big XII Championship game would be chosen by their BCS ranking. I thought that the voters in the Harris Poll and the USA Today Coaches Poll would be of sound mind and compare the losses that each team had suffered: Texas lost because of a dropped interception and a last second come-from-behind touchdown to the Biletnikoff Winner on the road, Oklahoma lost by double digits on a neutral field, and Texas Tech lost by 34 points on the road. So when I made that silly proposal, I had myself convinced that Texas would be the one in the BCS Championship.

Well, we all know what happened. Oklahoma ran up the score against some underwhelming teams, showing the grace and class that only Bob Stoops knows how to exhibit, and were rewarded by the voters with their annual loss in a BCS game. So this is where I will honor my bet:

Florida was the best team to play on January 8th.

The Gators were able to play well enough against an overrated opponent and I’m glad that Urban Meyer is getting his fill of victories. He’ll miss that feeling during the first year of his tenure at Notre Dame (tentatively scheduled for 2012). I still believe that Tim Tebow throws a decent spiral for a fullback and that the winner of the game would have been Texas had the two teams met. (By the way, some of the comments from you gentlemen about Tebow border on sexual assault. I don’t even think Spencer sucks off Tiger Woods that much)*

You see, Longhorns Defensive Coordinator and Coach-in-Waiting Will Muschamp is very familiar with the Gators. You might remember that he was able to take an underwhelming defensive squad and come up with a scheme that contained Tim Tebow (at Florida, mind you). Yeah, yeah, in that game Tebow had a couple of his Jesus-like** plays (a 2 yd TD rush and a 6 yd TD pass), but it still wasn’t enough against a quality defense with a quality coordinator. There is no doubt in my mind that Texas would’ve contained Tebow the same way that Auburn did that season.

Anyway, congrats to the Gators. Congrats to GatorTrey. Congrats to Gator fan mikeychx, the guy who runs a Cubs blog and lives in California. Good luck*** on your quest for a repeat next season. However, I’d like to remind you that the parallels to 2004-2005 are very eerie. Matt Leinart, like Tim Tebow, had just finished taking care of the Sooners in the BCS championship and decided to go for the repeat in his senior season. Texas, behind an All-American quarterback, had just finished a comeback victory over a Big Ten foe in a BCS bowl. Once Texas took care of Ohio State in the Horseshoe the following season, it was almost a foregone conclusion that USC and Texas would meet in the Rose Bowl, that year’s home for the BCS championship. There, the #2 ranked Longhorns upset “ESPN’s Team of the Century”.

I think that Texas is on another collision course for a Championship game with a senior former Heisman winner who won’t do diddly poo as a quarterback in the NFL. The site of the Championship for the 2009 season?

The Rose Bowl.

We’ll see you there. Getcha popcorn ready. Hook ‘Em.


*Tebow porn begins here. It’s actually Brennaman-esque in its disgustingness.

**Is this action very Jesus-like?

***not really


11 Responses

  1. booooo, should have used the pic of clown on the toilet

  2. I don’t think I’ve seen that one, chief. I would have definitely used it.

  3. I’m not quite sure, but I think clown may have used his “I’m wrong. Miz was right. The Big XII sucks.” post as a forum for to make a case for Texas as national champ and Florida as overrated.

    thoughts on this, anyone?

  4. You may not be quite sure but I am.

  5. he did not fulfill the deal.

  6. wait, did the plane land of fantasy island?

  7. cmfost is outraged by this bet-welching.

  8. ture story: I emailed clown within 20 minutes of the end of the game and said, “I think that plane just landed on fantasy island.”

    I crack myself up sometimes!

  9. clown didn’t man up.

  10. NEW POST

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